how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
