I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
