Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
