I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess