So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
