Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
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