So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
