I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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