One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
