so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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