question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
