I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
