boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
