Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
