She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
