saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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