how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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