that's an acceptable place to lick
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
