I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
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Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
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I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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