Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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