my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
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It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
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I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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