I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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