they need to just BURY HIM!
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize
