people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
