She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
my liver is dry heaving
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize