You work out of a Hotel?
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Randomize
