Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize