talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I can feel your judgement through the phone
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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