Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu http://tfl.nu/ucad
  Replies (12) Good night (7476) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  he said i'm too pretty to suck penis

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): he said i'm too pretty to suck penis http://tfl.nu/wzvb
  Replies (99) Good night (14003) Bad night (1894)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup http://tfl.nu/bt9z
  Replies (9) Good night (1419) Bad night (4517)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication. http://tfl.nu/dq9l
  Replies (6) Good night (3177) Bad night (1271)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (321): as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels. http://tfl.nu/o5u7
  Replies (5) Good night (3925) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious" http://tfl.nu/kvms
  Replies (4) Good night (3181) Bad night (768)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew http://tfl.nu/mfmq
  Replies (8) Good night (3860) Bad night (936)
• Favorite

  (409): View more from Texas

  It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (409): It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true http://tfl.nu/wq1h
  Replies (9) Good night (1047) Bad night (1498)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back http://tfl.nu/d3ys
  Replies (5) Good night (967) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ? http://tfl.nu/zpud
  Replies (8) Good night (1559) Bad night (596)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day" http://tfl.nu/o3b3
  Replies (2) Good night (1079) Bad night (466)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running. http://tfl.nu/b6k8
  Replies (6) Good night (1048) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing http://tfl.nu/s8vo
  Replies (2) Good night (324) Bad night (503)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear.. http://tfl.nu/ati2
  Replies (1) Good night (548) Bad night (621)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies. http://tfl.nu/vlya
  Replies (2) Good night (500) Bad night (379)

Randomize