found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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