Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
