were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle