I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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