How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize