when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize