its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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