Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Randomize
