i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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