his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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