yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
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he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
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I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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