at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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