did you get engaged???
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize