Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!