How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I just cut my nipple shaving
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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