How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
