We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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