Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
