god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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