your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
