ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
tell your sister to shave her snatch
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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