this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize