Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
